I want to share this week’s discoveries with you. It started on Monday morning, leaving home not long after 7:30 AM. At the hospital, the first thing I did was shed all of my street clothes. It was waiting then. I was to have a diagnostic cardiac catheterization and coronary angiography. After the procedure, the doctor explained three problems I had and that I would have to go to another hospital for open heart surgery.
That was not a surprise to me because I can quickly get short of breath, and if I keep pushing myself, there will be chest pain. It means what I was told at the hospital was not a surprise. It took me back 59 years to the end of 1964 and my arrival in Vietnam. My job in communications meant I should not be exposed to too much danger. That proved not to be true when six of the men I had trained with were killed very shortly after my arrival. That included Roger Buss. You can look up his name on the Vietnam Memorial, Panel 1E, Line 84. We trained together, and I helped him celebrate his 21st birthday.
In Vietnam, you were in constant danger no matter where you were or what you were doing. If you were not careful, you could constantly worry about being “in country.” I remember the VC bombing the US Embassy in Saigon in the spring of 1965. You learned to worry as little as possible. You knew fear whenever there was an attack, or you were away from the base.
Why would I bring up Vietnam? The doctor who did the cardiac catheterization and coronary angiogram explained the problems to me. There are three. They range from minor to major problems. I can constantly worry about my cardiac problems. They represent at least as much danger as Vietnam did. My odds of dying from my coronary problems are about as remote as the time I spent on base in Vietnam. I will continue to live my life as fully as possible. I also hope they can correct the problems with my heart. That’s not under my control either before or after cardiac surgery. I could not control when the VC would attack a base or engage us off the base. I can’t let myself worry about what I cannot control.
