Yesterday, I wrote a scene designed to show the main male character gives back to his community. You’ll need to know he, Sam, helped found a tech company that’s a leader in its field. He no longer takes part in the day-to-day activities of the business but is on-call to help out when problems arise which is rare. He volunteered and is mentoring a small group of students in a town not too far from where he is living at a college. One of his mentees is a brilliant young woman named Amelia Johnson. Amelia tells him that because she is good-looking people can’t believe she is smart. Worst, because she is smart, men seem to be afraid of her and dates are far and few between. Sam tells her that one of the founders, Delilah Wilson, of the company he started was also a very attractive woman. Sam says that the rest of the group of founders considered be just one of the boys and would offer her dating advice. That advice never went well. However, Sam offers to give her Amelia Delilah’s email address and he sure that Delilah can give her advice.
The scene is important to the novel in that it advances Sam’s humanity. I drew from my experiences in college, both as a student and as a teacher. I would often see attractive female students “dumbing down” their attractiveness. I had one student who wore glasses with huge dark frames. She told me she didn’t need them, but it made her look less attractive. She also chose to wear baggy clothes to hide her figure. In class, she would barely take part in discussions. All students had to come to my office and verbally present a plan for their project. I did not want them to get off track even before they had started. Her project was well thought out and her initial research was right on track. That led to a discussion about why she wanted to be viewed as less attractive.
Why can’t a woman be viewed as both attractive and smart? They say if they are too attractive it limits their ability to attract a lifetime partner. They tell me men who were willing to date them generally come in just two types. Handsome men with inflated egos, and men who want to display them as a trophy. I don’t know how to solve this problem. Writing a minor scene in the novel highlighting that problem is about the only thing I know I can do. What can you do, particularly the men reading this?
