The following paragraph was in one of my posts last week:
We learn quickly in our teens that falling in love is pleasurable. However, we also learn that breaking up, falling out of love, is very painful. Every generation has songs expressing how painful falling out of love can be. I have often wondered if this isn’t Mother Nature’s way of preventing addiction to the process of falling in love. What do you think?
I got an email from a psychologist telling me that there can be an actual addiction to falling in love. It surprised me. I thought the pain from falling out of love would be protective. I may be biased in feeling that way. As you know, I grew up moving often enough that it led me to avoid any dating. I did that because I knew of the hurt I had caused when I moved. I didn’t want to hurt another person.
I have been wondering if my decision to avoid dating is all that rare. Have some people been so hurt by a breakup, that they avoid dating? Surely there must be others like me who avoided dating because of the hurt it could cause others. What do you think? Do you know someone, or are you someone who avoided dating because of the hurt factor?
3 Responses
I think you might be an exception to the rule, as you are one of the kindest persons I know and always thinking of others before yourself, which seems right about the above blog. I am no expert but I think the general population when it comes to dating either are happy to get right back onto the horse and try again or generally people avoid dating for fear of being hurt themselves NOT worrying about hurting others, I think the self-preservation comes in first…
Thank you. It was the tears when I had to move that made me vow to never needlessly hurt someone.
You experienced a great loss which caused you pain, but you didn’t nor did anyone else intentionally cause that pain.