I am sorry it has taken me so long to return to this blog. We are in the midst of adding a room to our home. The county has decided to do some road work and is closing our dead-end road starting tomorrow and lasting until…? I am trying to complete three writing projects with deadlines and one without a deadline. And to top it off, keep this blog going.
Everyone beyond 14 knows what sex is and what intercourse is. You must ask yourself two main questions: “What is the purpose of the sex act, and what level of detail is necessary? Actually, the first question determines the answers to the second question. If a young couple responds to Mother Nature, the most crucial question is what happens afterward. If one of a couple uses sex to manipulate the other somehow, the details must clearly express that fact. If it is a long-married couple, the care both take to ensure the pleasure of the other is essential.
Those were three quick examples of the multitude of reasons couples engage in sex. In the case of the young couple, it was likely over too quickly for much detail beyond removing clothing and saying he entered her. How they treat each other afterward will be necessary to the story. In the case of the manipulative sex, it can be written like an equation, “if you do X, I will do Y.” X and Y will need to be explicit details. In a long-married couple, they both know how to give their partner maximum pleasure. There the details are essential. They usually begin with, “She did X because she knew it brought both of them pleasure.” Just substitute he for she for the male perspective. To see love in a long-term relationship, the reader must know why a partner would do such a thing during sex.
I didn’t want this discussion to turn into an X-rated blog. I think I’ve given you enough examples. Still, if I didn’t, I can answer your questions via email with more explicit details. I’ll leave you with something I heard in a mixed group discussion, “It’s okay for you guys because it doesn’t dribble down your leg for the next hour.”
2 Responses
Lauren,
You can use most words describing breasts. You can also can describe anything except extreme BDSM. If you need ideas, this email address will get you to courses that describe breast play gabriellens@gabriellemoore.com Good luck.
Sam,
You certainly wouldn’t want to describe a woman’s labia as looking like a turkey’s wattle. If you want to describe the intimate parts of a woman’s anatomy, you can use porn sites. If you look carefully, you will find almost all of them include a Photo section. If you’re unfamiliar with porn sites, use this site to locate one to use https://theporndude.com. I personally do not see the need for intimate detail. I think it’s best to leave it up to the reader’s imagination, i.e., “The view of her sex held the promise of love and satisfaction.” Or, even better, write nothing about the visual details of a woman’s private parts. I assume you are writing a fiction and not a gynecological textbook.
I’ll leave you with this advice, “Beware of what you write. It may come back to haunt you!”